Monday, March 06, 2017

New Band Shows - High Heels Lo Fi! <-- click for show details - we are playing at Stop, Drop & Roll on March 10th, Cherry Cola's on March 16th, and have 8 shows in total booked this year already. Plus a new website on Wednesday, a new EP and video stuff happening this spring. Get onthe mailing list, first page of the site, to stay in touch!!

Saturday, February 04, 2017

New Website, New Posts Soon! - Please turn email notifications on there so that you don't miss new posts!

We all have secrets. Perhaps, like me, you work in a corporate office during the day, but are an artist / rock singer at night. Perhaps you’re a shy, quiet person who wants to be a louder person. Perhaps you pretend to be “normal”, but you’re actually a superfun superfreak. It’s all good. For all of the interesting people with other sides, is for you!

I've learned a lot of things in my tumble around the sun, and this new site is where I'll be sharing some of my coping mechanisms, my survival skills, and my "kick your own ass" suggestions.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Discoveries from the Mirror at Hot Yoga Class

One of the things about hot yoga that freaked me out in the beginning is that you are supposed to look at yourself in the mirror for most of the 90 minute class. Ick. Unless I am busy painting my face, or checking my teeth for spinach, staring at myself in a mirror is unsettling. I have never really understood vanity, and it just makes me uncomfortable.

But this is the way things are done there, and I'm trying to think of it simply as a positioning tool. Are my arms even? Are my knees and elbows in line? Is my foot coming up over my head yet? As my practice is progressing, however, I couldn't help but notice a few other fascinating things. Well, fascinating to me, anyhow.

- My tranquil focussed face actually looks a bit grumpy and bitchy.

- My right shoulder is noticeably higher. This is logical, since my scoliosis bends my middle back to the left, but I didn't realize it was so pronounced.

- My left leg is thicker than the right, both the thigh and the calf. My right knee is often borked, and I sprained my right ankle quite badly last year, so I spend far more time standing on the left. I'm going to make an effort to stand on the right as much as possible when waiting for elevators, on the subway, etc.

- My arms are far more toned than they were 6 months ago. Neat.

- I am a bit tall for a girl. I'm only 5'7.75", but when compared to groups of people, I am slightly taller than the rest of the gals. I often forget this.

- My balance is pretty good when I am gazing at any part of the floor, but when I look up at the mirror like we are supposed to, I am suddenly unstable. (It also occurs when I have to look up at the ceiling, to some extent) Something about the mirror not being a stable visual surface throws off my focus. Weird. Working on this.

- Note to self: you look slimmer when you stand up straight. For goodness sake, stand up straight!

- My knees aren't screwed on correctly. They are twisted too far inward. To straighten my knees, I must turn my feet out at bit like a duck.

Basically, I forget how weird my body is. I know, everyone's body is weird - the human body is a tweaky demented creature. Now that I am reminded of this information, perhaps I can gently persuade some parts to even out, get in line, and balance more.

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Friday, January 06, 2017

New Blog Posts

Saturday, December 17, 2016

500 Instagram Posts!

Please follow me! <a href=""></a>

Wednesday, October 05, 2016 relaunch!

I am super excited about my latest project, and hope that you will all help me just a bit! Please check out the site, and use those share buttons at the bottom of each post - I'm hoping to get many people to Follow via Email (sidebar) and assist in spreading the word. We can change ourselves. We can get over Anxiety and Fear. We just have to have a plan, have a goal, and keep at it!

3 Movies That Helped Me Analyze My Life

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Thursday, September 15, 2016

"Be Less Shy Toronto"

"Public Speaking for Shy, Nervous Folks Toronto"

"Stop Being Shy Toronto"

"Be Less Shy Toronto"

"Social Anxiety Toronto"

"Public Speaking for Introverts Toronto"

I've gone from being literally too shy to speak unless spoken to, to being the raunchy wild singer of a rock band. I decided to become a different person, and spent several years rewiring my brain, and changing my reaction to anxiety. I've learned many things on my path from shy to screamer, and I can help you.

When I say "public speaking", I don't mean that everyone needs to be able to address a crowd of thousands. Maybe you just need to ask a question in class, speak to your crush beyond "hi", or tell the server you're allergic to fish. For extremely shy people, it's truly difficult to speak up and speak out - but I know how to get you there, without any traumatic fire walks or freaking you out.

If you're interested in a one hour workshop in a relaxed, low stress environment, please email me - when I have 10 people, I'll organize it.

We'll discuss:
- the science of fear
- the logic and illogicalness of shyness
- how to speak to strangers
- how to speak in public
- simple exercises so that you can babystep your way to becoming a more outgoing person

If you want to take that first step to becoming more comfortable in this world, being able to speak out when you really need to, please email immediately!

Thursday, September 08, 2016

Haiku Deathmath & Show Hosting

I love hosting shows! I have always enjoyed event planning, crowd wrangling, and keeping the audience energy up, but when I'm hosting instead of performing, it allows me to be a cheerleader for the real performers. I know, a vivacious host is performing in a different way - it is both more and less stress at the same time, but I truly love it.

The annual Toronto Haiku Head-to-head Deathmatch was amazing. People really seemed excited about the death and destruction, and the fact that they got to be rowdy at a poetry event. Here's my quote on that philosophy: Click

If you know of any shows / events / shindigs / hootenanys that might require a host, please let me know!

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Friday, September 02, 2016

Art: Part 2 - Visuals

I have always painted, drawn, doodled, created things that were visually expressive to me. Then I spent 3 years in college studying art history, typography, colour theory, composition, layout, and the ways of commercial art, graphic design, and visual communication.

Years passed, I was busy with work, running a zine, websites, moving to Toronto and falling in love with this city. I finally started painting again, this time in a very different style. It took a few years to evolve, but I hit upon a method of painting that was incredible enjoyable to do, and other people seemed to like it too. A friend was stunned once when I admitted that I've sold over 100 paintings. That doesn't necessarily mean they're good, just that it's a popular style that people want to hang in their homes. Happy hippie art. Abstracts with stuff in them. Dr. Seuss meets Miro.

But then I started assisting a friend with lighting. There is a lot of tech involved, and I really don't take to fighting with gear, but I learned, I listened, I fought through it. Then he took on the technical part of the visual projections at a monthly event, and I was able to concentrate on content - creating video clips, using samples, and mixing the projections live. Suddenly everything clicked - live visual performance art. This is what I've been wanting to do forever. Then that monthly event stopped running. Drat.

Now I want to VJ at least once a month, but there just aren't a lot of venues set up for it, or events that can pay a VJ (at least enough to cover my expenses & Uber home at 3am). Hopefully I'll find another regular gig again soon!

My vimeo page:

Next time - Photography!

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Saturday, August 13, 2016

Garden, after the rain

Friday, August 05, 2016

July & August Events

Pirate Party at The Shore Leave Tiki Bar (Danforth & Cowwell) Sat. Aug 6th

Toronto Poetry Project presents the annual Geek Slam on Wed. Aug. 10th- featuring Kari Maaren and hosted by Mike Bryant

I'll be VJing at Archi-textures at Round on Thurs. Aug. 11th

Nanochrist Album release party Fri. Sept 2 at Coalition

I'll be hosting the Toronto Haiku Head-to-Head Deathmatch on Tues. Sept. 6th at Supermarket.

High Heels Lo Fi is playing in London on Fri. Aug 19, Windsor Sat. Aug. 20, and Toronto Sun. Aug 21 - details will be at soon.

Monday, July 25, 2016

Monday July 25

First off, I'm still typing "June" all of the time. Trippy.

It's been three & a half weeks since I sprained my ankle, and although I have been steadily healing, it's super annoying having to think about every time I have to walk more than 10 steps. The lurchy subway is a hassle, and I'm very greatful to people who jump up to offer the gal with the cane a seat. Interestingly, only once has a man in a business suit offered a seat. Often it's middle aged women, but at least 70% of the time it's been Asian people. I hope that positive stereotypes are permitted, because I'm just going to say it - if a 3.5 week informal study is any indication, Asian people have better manners when it comes to offering a seat to cane-using people. Thank you nice folks!

When I'm done with this cane, I'm going to really watch oncoming passengers and jump up if I see anyone with a cane or other bothersome balancing issue. I encourage everyone to look up from their phones / books / newspapers at stops to check for anyone who really needs a seat. Balance is extremely hard for some, especially first thing in the morning.

It's been interesting realizing how uncomfortable I am asking for help. I have no problem asking for assistance for the band, or parties and events, or projects, but if it's personally for me, I just cannot do it unless I have no other option. Luckily, I am surrounded by wonderful people who fetch me water, remind me to put my foot up, and otherwise bully me into healing faster. I am extremely lucky.

This forced downtime has enabled me to think about some upcoming creative projects. I'm slowly getting into video more, so stay tuned for some (hopefully) interesting things!

My monthly VJ gig (Subspace) has retired, so that has freed up a lot of time. Also, since I stepped down as interim Director of the Art Bar Poetry Series when it retired on June 28th, I suddenly have even more "free" time. I might actually get to sit on patios in August! And clean the art room so that I can paint again!

Oh, the possibilities are endless...

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

June 29, 2016

The final show of the Art Bar Poetry Series was last night, and my volunteer position as Interim Director is finished. It's interesting - I might miss the frequency that I've been listening to poetry over the past year, but I'm excited to have those many hours per week back, to focus on my own projects. Which project? Well, things are brewing. Lists being made, you know how it is. But first and foremost I think I need a little break. I need to spend some times on patios with a sketchbook and a notebook. I need to sit under trees and perhaps even get a little sun.

I'm really excited about songwriting with the new band - there have been so many great ideas floating around, but no time to churn out new songs, as we've been swamped with shows! (I know, poor little us!) Cool times ahead, to be sure.

I also think I need to create a better workspace for my VJ art. I've been meaning to clear out my art room for ages - the time is actually coming soon. I know if I had a better setup, I could put in more hours per week, and actually produce some of the ideas I have in my head. And learn new software. And research new gigs. Vicious art circle! And redesign my website, and start a new one...

Ideas. I have them. It's the TIME I need!

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Wednesday, June 08, 2016

Upcoming Events

Tues. June 14
I'll be hosting The Art Bar Poetry Series.

Tues. June 28
I'll be hosting the Final The Art Bar Poetry night.

Thurs. June 30th - High Heels Lo Fi show
My band High Heels Lo Fi is playing a Pride event at the Bovine - Details - Facebook Event

Friday, May 13, 2016

A very strange bio...

I am digging through some poetry files, looking for what to read at my Art Bar feature next Tuesday, and found this bio:

Random Facts about Cynthia Gould:

- According to Hazmat Agfa, she painted a fine 1971-era Science Fiction novel cover that adorns his living room wall. Oh, and she cured boredom. That was cool.

- She is the singer-guitarist of Toronto's most shamefully filthy but hilarious drunk rock band High Heels Lo Fi.

- She married Rock & Roll at the Elvis chapel in Las Vegas

- She's working on a new book of poetry, so if you know of any good local publishers who are actually accepting new submissions this spring, please let her know ASAP

- She sleeps with a dagger under her bed

These are all true things. But strange that I would use this list as a spoken word bio? ha!